By Ashley Williams
It’s hard for me to believe that just 4 weeks ago, my life was in literal shambles. The end of the semester was approaching. Homework and group projects were piling up. I was convinced someone in my life was potentially the devil’s spawn. I felt trapped and like I had no way out. I could not see nor prepare for what was ahead of me because I was so broken down by my current predicament. It seemed as though everything that could go wrong, did go wrong. I previously wrote about my struggles with trusting God, but still, I prayed to ask God for peace and deliverance for my current situation.
Even when things in my life begin to settle, my spirit still felt trapped. As someone who has battled with depression for half of my life, I can feel the onset of an episode. I get an overwhelming sense of sadness that cannot be controlled. I also get a terrible pain in my chest that’s accompanied by constant shortness of breath. I know shit has gotten worse for me when the chest pain won’t go away. It was all just too much.
One thing that kept me afloat these last 4 months has been the presence of loved ones. A shared laugh to ease away the pain. My friends and family would not let me give up, and I am truly grateful for them. Having my friends to lean on has truly gotten me through everything depression has thrown at me. They helped me keep my spirits high and supported me through and through. Everyone needs someone in their life that’s a ride or die and that will help make the impossible possible. This piece is my gratitude for them.
As I look back over the year I am filled with joy. As I look forward to the next year, I am filled with anxious excitement as I embark on my new journey of life after graduate school. I’m closing out the year and this long fall semester with an air of thankfulness. I am grateful for the hardships I encountered because it got me to where I am. I am grateful for the experiences I’ve had. But most importantly, I’m thankful for the wonderful people that I have met that have shown me nothing but love and support. Thank you for getting me to the other side.
Ashley Williams is a Contributing Writer for the Pedestal Project, LLC.