Growth: It Ain’t Always Pretty, Sis.

By Jasmine Kelly

When most people think of growth, they think of the cocoon before the butterfly or tough times that do not last long and then BOOM, the beautiful change that you have waited for occurs. Let me tell you, it is not like that. Growth is something that has been on my mind lately because I have been coming face to face with myself in more ways than one. The parts of myself that I know exist but have chosen not to deal with. Aspects of myself such as how I feel about certain people, reconciliation with parts of my past, and most importantly, being accountable and showing up for myself. Let me tell you, that last one is the hardest.

New levels in life require advanced forms of maturity, and that does not happen without development. As I mature and find myself in new situations that require a better me, I understand that I have to address the things that I have chosen to suppress. Life is funny though. I have found that the more that I choose to ignore something, the more I encounter that very thing. Lately, that “thing” has been showing up for myself. I am not talking about in terms of work or school but for my dreams. My dreams will not work unless I do. I cannot half-ass myself either.

I am still making sure that I show up for myself, but I cannot say that I do so every day. What I will say, though, is that I am present more often than not. Some days I feel good about what I am doing as I progress towards my future and other times, I feel that I am not doing enough. I will say this, though; the road to growth is not linear. You fall, hit a few bumps in the road, make progress, make mistakes and there you are again, rolling along. For those who are on the same journey as myself, all I can say is keep at it. Keep going, expect speed bumps, but keep going because how you respond right now to where you are at this point in your life matters more than anything.

Jasmine Kelly is a contributing writer for the Pedestal Project, LLC. Jasmine is a higher education professional who believes in the powers of Black Twitter. You can follow her on Instagram @chicomydusty.

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