The Glory in Black Women Ghosting

By Jasmine Kelly

I know, I know; the title is a little misleading because no one likes it when someone “ghosts” them. In case you don’t know, ghosting is when someone ends an interpersonal relationship abruptly, and you do not hear from that person again. It has happened to the best of us. I even ghosted someone before, but I don’t think it is necessarily a bad thing. No, it does not feel good, especially if you were starting to feel the person. However, I do think that the power of ghosting should be used for good.

I think ghosting is especially good for women. Quite often, I think we tend to overexplain ourselves in situations that we need to remove ourselves from. For example, I recently ghosted a guy that I was dating because his communication sucked. In all fairness, I told him that the lack of it was an issue. He said that he would fix it. When the situation did not change, I did not bother to discuss the issue again. I ghosted. I did not bother to inquire why and stress myself out even more. I left.

I think ghosting is quite liberating in all actuality, but I have not always felt like this. I am an empath so, considering others’ feelings has always come naturally to me. Yet, it costed me. Putting others’ (men’s) feelings above my own often left me sad, angry, or disappointed. I had to remember that I am mine before I am anyone else’s (word to Nayirrah Waheed). For that reason, I had the right to control my space, and what and who I allow in it. No clarification is needed.

Header Image: Photo by Sora Shimazaki on Pexels.com

---

Jasmine Kelly is a contributing writer for the Pedestal Project, LLC. Jasmine is a higher education professional who believes in the powers of Black Twitter. You can follow her on Instagram @chicomydusty.