By Jasmine Kelly
Yes, yes, yes. I am sure that you have seen the tweets about Summer Walker’s album about how some people couldn’t wait to “cry and slide down the wall.” Also, as I type this story, DaniLeigh and (that popular rapper who shall remain nameless) got into an argument that resulted in that rapper calling the cops on her. Both incidents are unfortunate, but I have noticed that no one is talking about accountability. That is an issue.
I am not coming from the perspective of being better than and even more important not ever going through tough situations with a romantic partner, sneaky link, etc. However, after listening to Summer Walker’s album and even more so publicly witnessing the ups and downs that she had with the father of her child; I am confused as to why she seems to place a lot of blame on him as if she was not present as well. What was even more troubling to me was the number of women who couldn’t wait to “cry and slide down the wall.” I did like that Summer used her life as a cautionary tale for other women and Ciara’s prayer at the end was the cherry on top.
Listen, I have dealt with men who were not the best for me, but I can also tell you this; when I was made aware of red flags and certain toxic patterns, I acted in my best interest. People share what they want on social media, and no one ever knows what happens behind the scenes other than the actual individuals involved. I am also aware that healing is subjective. However, it is a totally different story when someone takes others along for the misery ride.
I am curious because I wonder at what point does someone decide to not be a glutton for punishment and disappointment? What must happen for an individual to take personal accountability? I find the current emotional state of some influential Black women to be a very important issue due to the level of influence that we have amongst each other and more importantly, younger Black women. I totally concur with what Scottie Beam shared on social media; Humiliation shouldn’t be a rite of passage. I agree and would add personal accountability should be the standard.
Jasmine Kelly is a contributing writer for the Pedestal Project, LLC. Jasmine is a higher education professional who believes in the powers of Black Twitter. You can follow her on Instagram @chicomydusty.